January 24, 2015

It's A Foxy Mama Post

I would like to explain what a FOXY MAMA is...
It's a woman that is in hot pursuit of her husband and to that end does things that will enhance their marriage and, in particular, spice up their sex life!
Jef Smith

Now, this fine specimen of a man would be my lover and friend.  We've been married thirty-two hot years, not all of which have been hot and I must admit we have not arrived, BUT, I would say our love has been tested and we are satisfyingly grateful to our God for giving this woman to this man.

You thought this post was going to be about sex, didn't you?  Well, it isn't...not this time.

What it is about is a MOMENT in my life that I experienced a breakthrough.

As a foxy mama, my desire is to show my husband that HE is the Man around here.  That he is respected, treasured, valued and that God put him 'over me' to protect me and our kids.
Now, I know, those words, 'over me' sound very strangling to feminists and women that DO NOT understand their true meaning....perhaps one day I can write more about that; not tonight.

I digress...

Back to my original purpose in writing.

I posted this little blurb on a Facebook Group I belong to...(not going to share that group either; not now!)

"Had a 'moment' last night that taught me a lesson perhaps someone else might need.
We were in bed. It was midnight and I had asked once whether he thought the boys should be off the computer watching a show since we were in bed and he took the thought and left the room. I got in bed and began to doze. When he came in, lay down and it got quiet, I knew two boys were too quiet to be off the computer yet. I asked about it, he stated they'd be off in a little bit...so I laidthere...waiting for that minute to come.
After five minutes, I stated that 'I hate them not respecting your word.' He sighed and told me to let it go, which only made me WANT to worry about his leadership, their hearts, the list goes on and on (you know what I mean, right girls?)...
BUT, I turned over and began to pray. To really let it go. To listen to Daddy's heart, turn the matter over to HIM, trusting Him that HE knows what our boys need, how my husband is responsible as the head of the house and that HE cares about them more than I or my Love do and that HE is ABLE to speak loud and clear. I felt the weight of the matter lift but I had to spend at least ten minutes continually arresting my thoughts of nagging, getting up and taking care of it myself (which is what I have done over and over) and right as I was finally falling off to sleep I HEARD LOUD SIXTEEN YR. OLD BOYS HEADING TO BED IN THEIR LOUD WAY...but I was grateful! I'd won, God had given me peace and I kept my heart right towards my Love by allowing GOD to be his HOLY SPIRIT, the one that leads him into the truth...not me.
It was Just a moment, but it was a heart-leaping moment of what it means to let go. How many of you ladies need to let go and I mean really let go of control? It's a terrifying thing to do. But it is a freeing thing to do...and I know that the thoughts are that, "IF I don't do it, it won't get done" or maybe, "You don't know my husband..."
God does... 
But the lesson was for me, not him...my freedom will only help to further God's plan to change my man.  
I want to be done with the nagging, judging, criticizing for not doing things the way I, Daune, want them done. It's been a process that's like an onion...I think I've beat that demon to the ground and then a new layer has to be peeled back...
Until Jesus comes back, He'll be perfecting that which concerns me...and you!"

This post in itself isn't really the big deal.  What is big is how I felt this morning when I awoke and sensed that I took a step in the right direction after all these years.

Women struggle with control.  Men struggle with pride.  Put together, you have a recipe for emasculation as well as crushing weights that will erode and eventually destroy a marriage.
Plain and simple:  disaster, like the devastation we see after an earthquake, tsunami, tornado or hurricane...

How often have I sabotaged or at the least, thwarted God's plan to work in our home because I was too stubborn to listen to my husband's words?

As you head to bed tonight, take a moment to ask Daddy to show you where He needs to free you so He can be free to deal with your man His way, not yours.

I'd love to hear from you.  Where do you struggle with this issue?

Have a great Sunday.

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