August 5, 2008

~Being Blind isn't so bad, after all~

It all boils down to IDOLATRY. In my heart- that He refuses to tolerate because He is a jealous God and His love for me cost Him His Son's life. He wants all of my heart, my affections and my full attention.

Late last night I watched a video clip sent by Amy from her church that spoke volumes to my heart. I woke with a heaviness and yet an urgency to seek Daddy's face. He took me to Luke 9, but this time when I read the Word, it was with a heart to only serve Him and 'hear' differently. Jesus taught His disciples several lessons in this chapter. The one that gripped my heart the most was about following Him. Actually, the entire chapter is about that, and He's really working on getting this message across to these guys and the crowds. He's Invested three years of His life into these men's lives and He knows He's leaving this world soon and they are the ones taking His message to the world.

He tells the crowd that if anyone would come after Him, 'let him deny himself, take up his cross and follow Me'. My version is the NLT and I like the way Jesus says to put aside your selfish ambitions, pick up your cross daily and follow Me. It's not like I've never heard this preached or read it myself, but until I saw it through 'blinded eyes' so I could really see what He is saying. Saul thought he knew the truth when he was going around killing Christians, but God blinded him so he could really see...isn't that what I needed? (Funny thing-this is exactly what our pastor taught about on Sunday-vision-seeing)

This Jesus, as God says earlier in the chapter is His Son, the Chosen One, LISTEN TO HIM. The weight of these words lays on my heart like a branding iron burning away the lies that I can no longer follow Him my way, continuing to have these 'idols' of my family, my ideas, my perception of what the kingdom is by the 'experiences' I've had, etc.

His love really is patient, kind and gentle; that love has brought me to this place, once again, of allowing the light of His truth to dispel the darkness in those places of pain and hurt.

God, blind me for as long as is necessary in order that I can really see with Your eyes.

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